Why Not

I decided to make this blog so that I can give my take on things out here in the land of The Inverted Cow. 

First let me start by saying, it has taken me almost 4 months to do this. 

I am hoping to learn how to enter video blogs, since my memory seems to be incredibly short lately a video blog would be less painful that writing it, loosing it, forgetting it & trying to re-write it all again. LOL

My husband is a professional smartass (which by the way is just one of the many things I LOVE about him.) and he uses it frequently to help deflect insults, pain, times when he doesn't have a great answer to give or when he finds things funny. 

Earlier this year some jar-head couldn't get that simple fact through their thick SKULL & decided to take him seriously. Honestly people if my husband ever gets serious with you, RUN! As long as he is joking around, being a smart ass & doing things that make him happy, he's in a real good head space.

Now this same person decided to take a joke & get serious about it & file charges against Art & take him to court. GOOD GRIEF! Apparently even the local RCMP were laughing about it. 

Anyway, by the time all was said & done, Art is not allowed to do the 1 job he absolutely loves, adores & would give his life to protect. What job is that? He is a school bus driver at heart. He would give his life for any of the kids on the school bus he drives, no matter what route it might be. Personally, I find it highly offensive that anyone would think that Art would ever do anything to harm any child.! 

We don't have any kids, well, our own anyway LOL Young Master McCosh has decided to adopt us & we really don't mind. He's a good kid who at the tender early teen years lost his father to alcoholism. He's a very mature, yet youthful man for his age. In many ways he reminds me of Art LOL.

Now about the real me that most of you will never see. I use to be a real easy going, happy-go-lucky kind of person. the past year or so has really made me hard. I mean life can do that to anybody, but this past year has been exceptionally hard on me. 

I have never had a very easy time making friends. I actually only have 1 childhood friend left & in my eyes that make her very special indeed. I have known Shelley since elementary school but really got to know her during jr. high. I have some of the fondest memories of her. We haven't gotten together lately & that is my fault. I need to get my sorry arse down to her end of the province specifically for a visit. Come to think of it, I better do that before the snow flies, eh Shelley?

Some people don't like me much & that just doesn't matter to me anymore, I am done trying to please people..."you can please some of the people some of the time, but you cant please all of the people all of the time." (Quote suddenly popped into my head. Author unknown. But quote is true nonetheless). You see for almost 2 years I tried to please someone & then I found that my efforts were all wasted & in vain. A month,, maybe 2 later I found out that there were other insults & slanderous things being said about me, behind my back. It was at that point my F____ YOU line got crossed big time. I tried one last time to talk to 1 of the people involved & all I got were more insults. That was it!! I am done being nice. Now if you insult me, you don't need to be in my life or even talk to me. I really don't need the stress, aggravation or heartache. No one deserves to be treated like that. I blocked them on Facebook & have cut them out of my life. 

Having said that, I give a lot of chances to people, more than some deserve, before I get to this point. You really have to push me before I blow but once I blow...lets just say it really bad & real messy. The likelihood of you being able to get back in after that are slim to none.

I know I have a temper & that it's pretty bad. Knowing that also means that I work around the clock to keep in in check. Why do you think a girl who like the luxuries of the city lives out in the bush? I'm one of those really quiet people that as long as I am still talking & making noise everything is still under control. Friends of mine, like Tracy for example, will tell you that if I get really quiet, get all prettied up & am smiling that you might want to hide someplace where I can't find you because my temper has just gotten to the boiling point & I am likely ready to blow by that point.  It's funny really because when I post that on Facebook all Tracy seems to have to say is, "OH SHIT!!" She's seen me stoned, she's seen me drunk, she's even seen me sober. Tracy has seen me play & work & has also seen me with broken a broken heart & an attitude, heart & action of compassion. 

There are very very few people in my life I call friend. Carolynn for example is another friend of mine. She's a doll & I absolutely love her to bits! I think she knows that though. I don't make that part of my friendships evident to all my friends & for that I'm sorry ladies. 

Carolynn taught me a very important thing back in the early 1990's & she doesn't even know it. She taught me that it's really ok to be me. Carolynn met me at a time in my life when I was living out a childhood dream. Yep, that's right, I actually lived out 1 dream of mine & it only took 3 years to finish it. :D  Some of my best times were experienced at Bethany. Met many many wonderful people that have touched my life for the better. I learned more during those 3 years than I have to date.

Carolynn has this huge, actually humongous heart filled with more love then most people you will meet. She's fabulous with kids. She's one of the most faithful & faith-filled women I have ever met & had the joy of getting to know. My heart breaks though when I realize that this very special lady is still not married. Maybe it's not where her life & faith is leading her though. That is not my call to make.

It's getting late here & although I have spent most of the day in bed with a stomach flu, I really should try and get to some sleep yet.

Life is shot so please don't let the jerks in life win. Live well, Love much & deeply, Laugh every chance you get & can make because you are never guaranteed your next breath. 

=:)

MJ